Survivors

Diary Entry
Canada, May 1917

Shell Shock. Photographer. Encyclopædia Britannica Image Quest. Web. 12 Dec 2012.http://quest.eb.com/images/115_888422

I have been discharged from my post now as I have been deemed physically unfit to fight with my injuries.
Now that I have returned home, I feel as though I do not belong in society. Returning to civilization has felt odd, and I do not think that I can ever live normally again. Sometimes, when Mother gently taps me on the shoulder, I become very defensive and immediately go into combat mode. It’s a natural instinct. I know that I have no reason to fear for any enemies as I am back home now, but the training tactics that I picked up during war have affected my behaviour and actions.
Here in Canada, suspects of enemy aliens are immediately imprisoned or deported (Cranny 34). Some people here are even more hostile towards German and Austrian-Hungarian immigrants than we soldiers were to our enemies in war. People have been calling Germans names such as “Huns” and “Crouts,” and some have even vandalized their houses (Passchendaele).
Doctors and nurses call what I am currently experiencing neurasthenia (Passchendaele) or shell shock. Most soldiers, if not all, become so scarred by war that they continue recovering from the horrors of it all at home.
I do not ever wish to return to war again. I believe that I have fought the best that I could for my country, and the horrors of war have disturbed me beyond my imagination. Unfortunately, I believe that many more young soldiers shall continue to choose to go to war as I did, and they shall suffer from the atrocities that I have observed. I only hope that the military leaders soon realize that too many lives have already been lost and that all the countries will eventually need to find a way to recover from destruction.